Imagining Bras… a Facebook Stunt

Today, female Facebook users everywhere united against an evil that has claimed the lives of many women, breast cancer.  What many of them don’t know, is that their unity may have led some men into serious sin.  Here’s what happened.  Women on Facebook sent around messages among themselves (attempting to leave all males out of the loop) so that all women would put their current bra color as their status update.  Obviously, men caught wind of this, and the secret is out of the bag.

I don’t have a problem with uniting behind a cause.  I don’t have a problem with women wearing bras (I prefer that they do, for modesty’s sake, and their comfort, or so I’m told).  What I have a problem with is when women don’t actively insist on proper behavior from men.  You’re probably thinking to yourself, “How did he jump to that ideal from where he was?”  Easily.  Women should require of men an attitude of service and an attitude of perfection.  When women allow men to act in certain inappropriate ways, it opens the door for men everywhere to “blow it”.  WOMEN, you play a role in men being TrueMen!

Women, when you talk about your bra color, you’re not merely mentioning a bra color, but you’re VIVIDLY describing your breast(s) to a man!  I know it sounds crazy, but your “harmless” act of awareness probably caused many men to sin, I hate to say.  For most guys, they don’t see or think of a bra and stop simply at the fabric and color.  A bra is an intimate thing and makes a man think about other intimate things.  I have to break it to you, men don’t simply stop at the color.

I wanted to share the thoughts of a Naval Officer on this topic: “I know breast cancer awareness is a good thing, but I don’t think the mission was accomplished.  Either 1) guys won’t figure it out and they  will move on with watching the BCS Football Game, or 2) they will pick up on and be drawn down a slippery slope to sin.  I am sure the women did not have this as their intent; they were trying to be fun, flirty and mysterious.  I just cannot condone it.  I personally have not struggled with fantasies for some time, but I led Bible studies for two years while in college, and I know how other men struggle with it.  I guess I just wanted women to know that some men struggle with it, and this is not helping.”

Take heed.  And, on a related side note, did you all realize that if women stopped being in pornography, it would stop?

Man up!

TrueManhood’s Guide to Virtue

Click for TrueManhood’s Guide to Virtue

LEARN VIRTUE, LIVE VIRTUE!

Man up!

One Billion Stories, All Across the Country

I was fortunate enough to meet a young man named Seth DeMoor at the FOCUS Conference in Orlando, Florida last week.  Seth recently graduated from the University of Colorado at Boulder and has decided to ride his bicycle across the country, shooting stories and interviews with as many Catholics as he can.  He’s currently trekking through Florida, heading north and then west.  Seth started a website, One Billion Stories.com and sees this adventure as a pilgrimage and calling.  His tag-line is “Jumping off the fence, leaving behind mediocrity by virtue of video streams.”

He took some time to interview me about TrueManhood.  Hope you like it.  Click HERE for TrueManhood.com on OneBillionStories.com.

If you would, please click on Seth’s link “Can I Help?“.

Man up!

Tuesdays with Daddy – My Primary Vocation & Responsibility

Sometimes it’s hard to clearly determine priorities.  What’s really number one in my life?  Why is it number one?  What else must occur in order for number one to stay number one?  As a husband and father, my primary vocation is to care for my wife and children, and this is where priorities get sticky for me.  In order to care for them, I need to be with them, but at the same time, I also need to provide shelter, clothing, food and safety – the essentials.  In order to provide the essentials, I have to earn money.  In order to earn money, I have to be away from them, either at my office, on the road speaking or at other locations outside the home.  Since I’m also studying for my master’s degree, my time is taxed heavily.  This isn’t even to mention upkeep of the house and vehicles, house chores and other necessary errands that must be completed.  How do I determine rankings of my responsibilities?

I’ve found that taking myself out of the equation is the best way to make the determinations.  What?  Here’s what I mean… I try to remove my desires, my wants, my preferences and instead, place my wife and children (and all of their needs, wants and desires) first.  When I do this, I find that my emotions are kept in check (even though I might want to be making money, hanging with my guy friends or watching a game).  When my emotions are kept in check, I am able to clearly determine what’s important.  Keep in mind, that making money isn’t bad, and hanging with your guy friends isn’t bad.  They are both goods things.  However, if making money, hanging out with your guy friends or any other activity/project/endeavor takes you away from your priorities, they become distractions and hindrances.

So, when determining priorities, I recommend removing yourself and your emotions from the decision making process.  Once you do that, your mind will be clear and you’ll be able to clearly make the right decisions.  Best of luck.

Man up!

Two Stories

I came across this story a while back, and actually used it at a retreat I ran to intro a talk on virtue.  I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

THE FIRST STORY: Many years ago, Al Capone virtually owned Chicago. Capone wasn’t famous for anything heroic. He was notorious for enmeshing the windy city in everything from bootlegged booze and prostitution to murder.  Capone had a lawyer nicknamed “Easy Eddie.” He was his lawyer for a good reason. Eddie was very good! In fact, Eddie’s skill at legal maneuvering kept Big Al out of jail for a long time.

To show his appreciation, Capone paid Eddie very well.  Not only was the money big, but Eddie also got special dividends.  For instance, he and his family occupied a fenced-in mansion with live-in help and all of the conveniences of the day. The estate was so large that it filled an entire Chicago City block.

Eddie lived the high life of the Chicago mob and gave little consideration to the atrocities that went on around him.  Eddie had a soft spot, however. He had a son that he loved dearly. Eddie saw to it that his young son had clothes, cars, and a good education. Nothing was withheld. Price was no object. And, despite his involvement with organized crime, Eddie even tried to teach him right from wrong. Eddie wanted his son to be a better man than he was. Yet, with all his wealth and influence, there were two things he couldn’t give his son; he couldn’t pass on a good name or a good example.

One day, Easy Eddie reached a difficult decision. Eddie wanted to rectify wrongs he had done.  He decided he would go to the authorities and tell the truth about Al “Scarface” Capone, clean up his tarnished name, and offer his son some semblance of integrity. To do this, he would have to testify against The Mob, and he knew that the cost would be great.

So, he testified. Within the year, Easy Eddie’s life ended in a blaze of gunfire on a lonely Chicago Street. But in his eyes, he had given his son the greatest gift he had to offer, at the greatest price he could ever pay.  Police removed from his pockets a rosary, a crucifix, a religious medallion, and a poem clipped from a magazine. The poem read: The clock of life is wound but once, And no man has the power to tell just when the hands will stop at late or early hour. Now is the only time you own. Live, love, toil with a will. Place no faith in time. For the clock may soon be still.

THE SECOND STORY: World War II produced many heroes. One such man was Lieutenant Commander Butch O’Hare. He was a fighter pilot assigned to the aircraft carrier Lexington in the South Pacific. One day his entire squadron was sent on a mission. After he was airborne, he looked at his fuel gauge and realized that someone had forgotten to top off his fuel tank. He would not have enough fuel to complete his mission and get back to his ship. His flight leader told him to return to the carrier. Reluctantly, he dropped out of formation and headed back to the fleet.

As he was returning to the ship he saw something that turned his blood cold: a squadron of Japanese aircraft were speeding their way toward the American fleet. The American fighters were gone on a sortie, and the fleet was all but defenseless. He couldn’t reach his squadron and bring them back in time to save the fleet. Nor could he warn the fleet of the approaching danger.

There was only one thing to do. He must somehow divert them from the fleet. Laying aside all thoughts of personal safety, he dove into the formation of Japanese planes. Wing-mounted 50 caliber’s blazed as he charged in, attacking one surprised enemy plane and then another. Butch wove in and out of the now broken formation and fired at as many planes as possible until all his ammunition was finally spent. Undaunted, he continued the assault. He dove at the planes, trying to clip a wing or tail in hopes of damaging as many enemy planes as possible and rendering them unfit to fly.

Finally, the exasperated Japanese squadron took off in another direction.  Deeply relieved, Butch O’Hare and his tattered fighter limped back to the carrier. Upon arrival, he reported in and related the event surrounding his return. The film from the gun-camera mounted on his plane told the tale.  It showed the extent of Butch’s daring attempt to protect his fleet. He had, in fact, destroyed five enemy aircraft.

This took place on February 20, 1942, and for that action Butch became the Navy’s first Ace of W.W.II, and the first Naval Aviator to win the Congressional Medal of Honor.  A year later Butch was killed in aerial combat at the age of 29.

His home town would not allow the memory of this WW II hero to fade, and today, O’Hare Airport in Chicago is named in tribute to the courage of this great man. So, the next time you find yourself at O’Hare International, give some thought to visiting Butch’s memorial displaying his statue and his Medal of Honor. It’s located between Terminals 1 and 2.

SO WHAT DO THESE TWO STORIES HAVE TO DO WITH EACH OTHER?

Butch O’Hare was “Easy Eddie’s” son!

Man up!

“Fighting for Manliness” a HUGE Success!

My talk on New Year’s Eve was a HUGE success! I gave the ‘Men’s Only’ Breakout Sessions on December 31st at the FOCUS National Conference in Orlando, Florida. FOCUS is the Fellowship of Catholic University Students, a college campus ministry outreach organization that radically turned my life around in college. It was an honor and privilege to be asked to speak at this year’s conference. The conference was a five day, action-packed, intense conference with great speakers, great sponsors and incredible celebrations of the Holy Mass. There were around 4,000 college students gathered together to celebrate their faith. The witness of their vibrant faith is energizing and invigorating, I wish you could have seen it!

My talk focused on a few main points: manliness = virtue, manly leadership (imitating Christ), the evils of pornography, the just treatment of women and living manliness. I wanted to be intense and “in your face” with my talk, and from the feedback I received, the men really enjoyed it. I think it would be disrespectful and counterproductive to water down the message to men, so I was intense and in your face.

A video of my talk will be available in the coming weeks, so please check back later.

Fr. Emil Kapaun – A TrueMan, and Great Example of Holiness

Father Emil Kapaun of Pilsen, Kansas died a hero at the young age of 35 in a North Korean POW camp in 1951.  His message of hope and resolve to never give up still resonates today. The family of Chase Kear hoped that praying to Kapaun would help heal Chase, who was critically injured in 2008. Now the Vatican is investigating whether Chase Kear is a miracle, and whether Kapaun deserves to be a saint.  Whether the Church officially canonizes Fr. Kapaun or not, we can all take many lessons from him.  He was a true servant, always putting others and their needs before his own.  He broke racial and religious barriers by being courageous enough to speak and live the Good News of Jesus Christ as Lord.  May He rest in peace.   Here is a good site to read more about Fr Kapaun, and now two trailers about a documentary that was made about Fr. Kapaun.

Version 1:

Version 2:

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