Porn Shop Shuts Down Near Buffalo, NY

Lots of people ask us if we believe that we can make a difference with our protests of sexually oriented businesses.  We always answer “Of course!”  When we’re out there, it’s easy to question our effectiveness, but we do make a difference.  The Catholic men’s group in Buffalo, NY knows this well, too.  They call themselves The Men of Jesus Christ.  I suggest you check out their website.  Here’s a recent story from them about a porn shop they were instrumental in shutting down.

Now this isn’t news from the Wall Street Journal, but for us in this small town of Kenmore NY, it is a tremendous victory.  I am talking about the Village Books and News adult shop located in one of the most densely populated family areas in Buffalo.  It is a full fledged porn shop and has been in the town for over 30 years.  Indecency laws have been passed to ban pornography shops in the town, but since this the shop was established before the laws were passed, they were grandfathered in, and has remained the eye-sore of the community.  The other day as I was passing by I noticed that the neon sign that says “Adult Video” has been turned off for the first time in 30 years, and a sign that says the store is closed.  A shop that was open 24 hours a day is now gone.

The last time people protested the establishment was in the days of its inception back in the late 70′s and since then it has been tucked in a plaza that most people don’t pay attention to, not because they feel it isn’t harmful, but because it has been there for so long, and its reign has finally come to an end.

It wasn’t until a couple years ago when a couple of us guys decided to pray out there on a weekly basis when a revival began, and it was met with a fight.  We decided to engage in prayer and nothing else in front the place.  Peaceful and prayerful.  We were met with the police threatening arrest, to people screaming and shouting at us, to engaging conversation from people wondering what we were doing.  This one time we were praying as we usually do, and a guy was walking toward us.  When he passed us, there was no eye contact, no conversation, and he planted himself right next to us and started praying with us. When we finished, he kept on his way.  It was simply an amazing act of the Holy Spirit.  It is difficult though.  There was a time when a couple of girls were passing by and asked us what we were doing. We told them and they were shocked, only because they felt there there is nothing wrong with it. After a long conversation. the one girl admitted that her father had a huge porn addiction and went on to explain how that affected her as a female and her relationships with other men.  It was touching, but at the same time devastating.

I have a tendency to think we were doing good out there, but when it comes down to it, it was God’s will that lead the way. I cannot help to think that it was prayer that led to the shutdown of this joint, and it was difficult, to say the least to keep it going.  In Buffalo, when its cold, well, its COLD.  And during prayer we got in the habit of kneeling as we sung the Chaplet of Divine Mercy, which needless to say was not pleasant to listen to when you hear voices like ours.  We know it had an effect though.  There was a night when we started singing, and the clerk as he heard us, would increase the volume of a movie playing in the shop.  As he raised the volume inside, we raised the volume outside. You just knew there was a spiritual battle taking place.  We would start with the St. Michael prayer and then entrust the closing of this place to Mary, a living sign of purity, the real Woman, followed by a rosary and the Chaplet of Divine Mercy.  It was our Mother that guided the closing of this place.  It is Her that is leading this mission.

I want to simply conclude that anyone reading this can make a difference in your area.  All you need to do is say YES!  Say yes to going to a place to pray in public even if it makes you feel incredibly uncomfortable.  Christ knows that, and all He asks is for you to be His vessel and He will do the rest. Christ has allowed us to be disciples in His mission and He is calling you too!  You just need to answer the call.  Three guys joined together in prayer in front of multiple indecent shops and this is what God has brought from it:
1) We prayed out in the warmth and the cold for such a long time, and this book shop shuts down after over 30 years.
2) We prayed once outside of the hamburg strip club, the place shuts down a few weeks later
3) We prayed and acted on the pornographic building with a cover sign facing all traffic of a major turnpike, the sign was removed within 2 weeks after the owner said it would never come down.
4) Family Video has yet to get a tenant to their building, which is the cornerstone to them staying economically viable.
This was achieved with a small number of guys. You men reading this can do the same.  What if there were 10 guys?  What if there were 20 guys?  What if there were 100 guys? What of there were teams scattered around the city protesting these places?  We could change an entire community!

You are being called as men to organize and shut these places down, which includes porn shops, strip clubs, and abortion clinics.  If you have not been out, get motivated to change this culture, and in return God will take care of the rest. We will be engaging in more battles to come so stay tuned to the site.  Stay strong brothers and God Bless

Rosary Masculinity – May, the Month of Mary

I often tell men that the Rosary, although a bit contrary to our initial inclination, is an incredibly powerful prayer for men.  After all, if we want to be more like Christ (the perfection of masculinity), shouldn’t we think about, imitate and meditate on his life?  What a perfect tool the Church gives us in the Rosary!

Here’s a great article from Jason Godin, posted on Catholic News Agency yesterday, May 2, 2011 about Rosary Masculinity…

Some elements of our culture are calling men to embrace a very dark form of masculinity, based on violence, domination of women and self-adulation – messages that are found in video games, movies and music.

Yet real men know the emptiness, futility and ultimate falsehood of this view of life. As we begin this month of May – this month of Mary – men from all walks of life should accept the challenge of living a different form of masculinity by praying the rosary daily. Men who commit themselves to contemplating the rosary mysteries will discover a treasury of lessons on how to define masculinity and live it actively, fearlessly and full of hope.

Joyful Mysteries

The Joyful Mysteries, recited on Mondays and Saturdays, provide a basic definition of masculinity. By exalting in the fact that Mary answered “Yes” to the angel Gabriel at the Annunciation, men can see that the masculine life is worth living as God chose to live among men. Placing oneself prayerfully in the sandals of St. Joseph at the Nativity helps men appreciate how the masculine life, even in its earliest stage, is also precious and worth defending. The Presentation reveals how men can find authentic masculinity by remaining obedient observers of absolute truth found through, in, and with Christ. Living, defending, and obediently observing absolute truth is not easy for men in any age of history, but as Zachariah must have realized upon learning that his barren wife, Elizabeth, carried a child, nothing is impossible with God.

Luminous Mysteries

The Luminous Mysteries, the latest addition to the rosary added by Blessed John Paul II, are recited on Thursdays. In these “Mysteries of Light,” the public ministry of Jesus Christ between his Baptism and his Passion reveals to men how to transform their masculinity into fearless action. Jesus proclaimed the Kingdom of God by instructing others with teachings and parables. The lessons continue to remain relevant for men in their mission for masculinity, as Jesus addressed such topics as anger, adultery, divorce, oaths, retaliation, almsgiving, and fasting (cf. Mt 3-7). The Wedding at Cana and, later, the Transfiguration, confirm how real masculinity requires not only listening to Jesus when instructed by Mary, but to do so fearlessly (cf. Jn 2:5, Mt 17:7). The Institution of the Eucharist nourishes men with the fact that such fearless, active masculinity is never accomplished alone.

The Sorrowful Mysteries

The Sorrowful Mysteries, recited on Tuesdays and Fridays, illustrate for men the personal price of responsible masculinity. Jesus’ agonizing prayer on the Mount of Olives reminds men that even the Alpha Male struggled but persevered in love for mankind (cf. Lk 22:42). Jesus himself suffered harsh physical pain when scourged at the pillar and crowned with thorns by mocking soldiers. Masculinity demands men constantly to carry their own crosses – in their families, workplace, and communities – with the same humble stamina of Jesus. The crucifixion illuminates in a profound way how masculinity requires that men must ultimately “die to self” in their service and love of others.

Glorious Mysteries

The Glorious Mysteries, recited on Wednesdays and Sundays, provide masculinity with crucial dimensions of renewal, hope andnobility. When contemplating the Resurrection, men realize how they can always rediscover and relive masculinity even when they stumble. The Ascension directs masculine sights away from mundane goals and toward a destiny of heavenly triumph. Pentecost, when the Holy Spirit descended upon the disciples, shows how the power of the Holy Spirit can provide even a timid masculinity with an inner strength. Finally, the Assumption and Coronation of the Blessed Virgin Mary illustrate masculinity as a knightly privilege, where men walk beside Mary, the Queen of the Angels and Saints, when contemplating the face of Christ.

Men, use this month to pray the rosary on a daily basis. But be prepared. Heeding the challenge just might make you think and act more like a man of God.

* Jason Godin teaches U.S. history at Blinn College in Bryan, Texas, where he lives with his wife and two children.

And, just as a shout out to a friend and former college and master’s level professor… I HIGHLY recommend Dr. Edward Sri’s book “The New Rosary in Scripture” as a guide to help you pray the Rosary from a Scriptural standpoint.  It is a great resource.

TrueMan up!

Prayer Question

I received an email from a blog reader today and I thought I’d share the question and my response here.  Thought it might be helpful for more than just this one guy.  The question was: “My prayer life is really screwed-up.  I was taught that a prayer life is a dialogue with God, through Jesus, about how to grow closer, gain insight and follow Christ.  My prayers are rantings, raving, and venting about stupid and ridiculous things. Where did I go wrong?”

My response was pretty basic and doesn’t cover everything, but here’s what I suggested: “Thanks for the email.  The fact that you are concerned about this shows that you care.  There is a way to dialogue with God, but there’s not only one way.  You have to find your own way to pray.  I recommend finding some solid books on prayer, talking to a priest, listening to CDs/mp3s on the topic, etc.

Start with this, to get back into the swing of properly ordered prayer… A.C.T.S. is an acronym to structure your prayer.  It may help.

• Adoration – Adoring God.
• Contrition – Showing remorse for your sins against God.
• Thanksgiving – Giving thanks for anything and everything.
• Supplication – Asking God for things/requests that you need/want.

You can also spend time, not only in contemplative prayer, but in meditation, journaling, sitting in silence, repetitive prayer, spending time in Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament, etc.

All the best.  Keep trying!”

TrueMan up!

“The Day You Give Birth Is the Day Your…”

“The day you give birth is the day your opinion should matter!” screamed a young female passerby. Really? Is that all this is to you, a bunch of opinions? Really?

This was just one of the many negative comments we received yesterday while praying outside of the Planned Parenthood murder mill here in Colorado Springs. I was out with my buddy Joe, a pro-life giant – faithful to prayer and protest outside of Planned Parenthood EVERY Friday afternoon. On the outside, Joe is mild-mannered, calm and prayerful. Inside, I sense that he’s a raging bull! The fury that rages inside him, because of the injustices against the thousands of innocent unborn babies that are brutally murdered every day in the US (nearly 4,000 babies per day!), is tempered by the Holy Spirit and guided thereby to do much good in our world. He, as we all should be, is a man of action. He puts his ‘money where his mouth is’ and is out there praying every Friday for the end to abortion.

One lady driving by stopped and yelled out her window, “Wait until it’s your wife who is raped!  I’m calling the cops on you guys!”  Another female driver stopped in the middle of the intersection to deliberately give us the finger, the ‘ol Jersey salute.  She stared me down like I was the bad guy, because I was there, on my knees, meditating on the Crucifixion of our Lord and praying for babies.  Absolutely ridiculous.

Listen, if you’re not Pro-Life, you’re Pro-Death.  There’s no other distinction.  Life or Death.  You’ve never heard anybody say “It’s a life or death, or choice, situation.”  Right?  It’s way more than a choice.  Abortion is murder.  And, what’s more, THIS IS NOT SIMPLY A WOMAN’S ISSUE!  Men, this is one of those things that we MUST step up and defend.  We must protect our women and children.  We must stand up for the common good.  We must lead in this fight.  We must stand in opposition to faulty and immoral laws.  We must stand up against evil.  We must stand against our post-abortive culture.  We must stand up and say enough is enough.

On Monday of this past week, I took my family to the Rocky Mountain March for Life.  It took place on Martin Luther King Jr’s birthday.  There was a pastor from Oakland, CA there to speak to the crowd.  (I apologize for not remembering his name.)  He was a black pastor, and spoke heavily about the effects of abortion on the black women (and men, and families, and businesses, and culture and so on) in his “neighborhood”.  One thing he said, that has really troubled me the last many days, is that the vast majority of people sitting in the pews on Sunday in black churches across the country are “post-abortive”.  This means that they have been effected, either directly or indirectly, by abortion.  Meaning as well, that they may be traumatized (although usually in silence) by the negative effects of abortion.  His whole point was that it is incredibly difficult to reach out to this portion of the population, because so many people don’t want to be told that what they’ve done has been wrong, or that they’re wrong in their thinking.  So many people want to keep the status quo, instead of pushing the envelope and challenging what is wrong so that what is right can be brought out and experienced by the masses.

There’s a lot more I could write about this today, but will keep it for additional posts in the future.  For now, please join the pro-life movement in praying for the unborn and for the end to abortion.

TrueMan up!

“Lately, Life Has Been a Roller Coaster”

Do you ever have those periods of time when life is, well, crazy?  When EVERYTHING hits the fan, deadlines are coming, stressors are numerous, money is constantly on your mind?  When you’re trying to live life to the fullest, be a great man, attend to your responsibilities and give everything your all?  I’ve had a few straight months of living like that.  Where life wouldn’t seem to slow down, and you’re always looking ahead to see if there’s an oxygen break coming soon.

Over the past two months specifically, I have been experiencing a lot.  LOTS of uncertainty and unknown.  Lately, life has been, as they say, a roller coaster.  TrueManhood.com Blog has been the recipient of a serious amount of neglect from me, and to my passionate readers and daily-blog-followers, I apologize.  I have some great stuff planned, that should be coming your way soon.

When life gets like this, I try to do a few things.  For instance… when I have uncertainty, I tend to pray more.  I try to listen harder to what God wants from me.  I try really hard to be aware of what’s happening in my life, taking an objective view of what is going on and what it could possibly mean.  I also tend to be better with money, realizing that only because we’ve been good with money when it’s fruitful and abundant can we make it when things are, let’s say, tighter.  I try to spend as much time with my family as I can, when life gets crazy busy.  The more time with them, the more focused I can be when I’m working – always remembering that work is work and home/family is home/family.  To name a few.

If life is throwing high-heat, curve balls, screw balls and spit balls at you, call time out and gather yourself.  Rely more on God.  Listen to Him more.  Step back for a moment and see what’s important and urgent.  You’ll make clearer decisions, reduce your blood pressure and overall, be a better man.  Oh yeah, did I mention that this sort of behavior is like working on growing in virtue?

TrueMan up!

Victims of Addiction

During the month of November, one of Pope Benedict XVI’s prayer intentions is for victims of addiction, both those who are addicted, as well as those effected by the addiction of someone else.  It’s important for us to pray for one another, whether we’ve had or have an addiction or not.  For those who are addicted to pornography, I want to say to you that there is hope.  There is freedom outside of pornography abuse.  There are ways to find help and resources out there for you.  If you would like more info, or specific help, or possibly to be referred to a psychotherapist who specializes in pornography addiction, please email us at Info@TrueManhood.com and we can get you in touch with the correct resource.

Take a few minutes to watch this video.  Fr. Kubicki reflects on PBXVI’s prayer intention for November.  Please watch it the whole way through, as there is helpful information about addictions towards the second half.  All the best.

TrueMan up!

The Rosary – A Life Saver

Glenn Hockton, a 19 year old British soldier, claims that a rosary saved his life in battle while deployed to the Middle East.  The rosary was a gift from his mother “for protection”.  Apparently, Glenn noticed that the rosary he had around his neck had fallen off and so he bent down to pick it up.  At that time, he noticed that he was standing on a land mine.  He stood on the mine for 45 minutes while his fellow soldiers disarmed it.

I normally wouldn’t write about anything British, but I found this story interesting.  Hockton claims to also have been shot on a previous deployment, although that time, his body armor saved his life.

The power of the Rosary is incredible.  For those who don’t know, it’s a mixture of repetitive prayer mixed with meditative prayer.  The repetitive prayers are mostly made up of the Hail Mary (all Scriptural, by the way) and the meditative prayers are made up of thinking about (aka: meditating on) the various periods of Christ’s life; ie, the Incarnation and His childhood, then the heart of His ministry, then His passion & death and then the Resurrection and Heavenly imagery of Mary’s Queenship, as Queen Mother (also Scriptural).  The Rosary is an incredible prayer and has played a role in the conversion of many hearts, including mine.  I urge you to dive into the Rosary and see what happens!

Back to the story of Glenn Hockton… his great-grandfather, a soldier in the British military, also claims to have been saved in battle during WWII by the rosary.  Interestingly enough, Hockton’s great-grandfather’s last name was Truman (TrueMan).

TrueMan up!

Tuesdays with Daddy – Father’s Edition

To all the men who are fathers… today’s “Tuesdays with Daddy” is for you.  Unfortunately, my opportunity to be home with my girls on Tuesdays will be coming to an end in about a month.  I thought it would be a good idea to put forth a challenge to all the dads out there, to keep you thinking, to keep you purposeful in your parenting.  Read over these questions and be honest with yourself about the answers.  If something’s not up to par, make a change today.  I believe that we are all on a journey towards being the best father that we can be.  The journey requires us to always be moving forward, always toward being better.

• Do you tell your children, not just everyday, but every chance you have, that you love them?
• Do your actions match up with your words?
• Do you love your wife?
• Does your love (action!) match up with your “I love yous”?
• Do your children see you loving your wife?
• Do your children have a healthy and realistic understanding of love, or is it what they see on television, in movies and online?
• Do you prioritize your life well?  Or do you give one (or more) part more attention and neglect the other things you ought to be doing?
• Are you addicted to anything?  Porn?  Alcohol?  ESPN?  Work? etc.
• Are you working to overcome your addiction?  (Ask me if you need resources… Dave@TrueManhood.com)
• Do you strive to grow in virtue?
• Are you faithful to a daily prayer life?  To a Sacramental life?
• Do your children know that you pray?
• Do you pray with your children everyday?
• Are you actively involved in the spiritual formation of your children daily?
• Do you pass on responsibilities and place them on your wife and/or childcare provider?
• Do you rejoice in your children?
• What else do you need to work on?

Man up!

“Our lives change when our habits change.”  - Matthew Kelly

Unnerving Situations in D.C. and All Over

I’m overwhelmed by what’s taking place in our country.  The decision by our nation to elect Barack Hussein Obama as president is proving disastrous.  What’s a TrueMan to do about all of the mess being made in Washington?  I’m at a loss.

I would really appreciate your comments and questions on this post because I think that a healthy dialogue among men who see what’s happening (whether it be with the health(death)care bills, socialist ideals, deceitful politicians hiding behind the title “Catholic” or other) would be good.  It would help me, I know that for certain.  But what’s a TrueMan to do when he sees his government wielding unhealthy amounts of power and influence?  [It's not new, but it's worse than it's ever been - my humble opinion.]  Do we grab our guns and start a revolt?  Do we stand by and watch socialist politicians ruin America?  Do we do something else? I don’t know that there’s any good answers right now.  Obviously, one thing we should be doing is praying for the conversion of Obama’s soul, as well as his elected officials, we should be praying for the end to abortion and we should be praying for a quick and just fix to government run healthcare.

Please comment.

Man up!

Encouraging Men to Get Involved

Here’s my latest article on iibloom.com, posted yesterday.

For some people, it’s a struggle to figure out why men aren’t involved at church and church-related events. When we take a look at a typical parish in the United States, we see a Church that is struggling to entice, encourage and strengthen men as leaders. Why is this? Is it the content, is it the timing, is it the other people in attendance? Is it something internal? Do they feel emasculated by it? Is it a lack of catechesis? Is there a power struggle? Or maybe even something else?

(Please note, this article is a generalization; please keep this in mind. Many men are fully engaged in the life of the Church and many parishes have a thriving men’s population. The point of this article is to find ways to help encourage men who aren’t involved to become involved.)

Men won’t get involved in “stuff” if they don’t see a value in it. Also, they aren’t likely to attend a new event, group or club unless they know someone else who is attending, and know them well. Another reason men won’t get involved is if they see the stuff as weak, lame or feminine. Unfortunately, many men see Mass, Church events, groups and retreats through this lens. On my website, I have mentioned that the Church is “by women, for women,” and this is a big reason why men aren’t involved. I say this because the vast majority of parishes in the US have a very lopsided attendance and volunteer demographic. The reason for this is because men fail to step up and into leadership and volunteer roles. 

Men shouldn’t be forced into praying like women pray, it doesn’t work for us. Men need to pray the way men were created to pray. Men shouldn’t be forced into activities that are similar to women’s activities, it does’t work for us. Men should participate in activities that they were created for. There’s a difference, and that difference is important.

The difference is, as the late Pope John Paul II often talked about, is that men and women were created equal in dignity, but different in role. In order for men to fulfill their role, their lives must be oriented correctly towards what they were created for. A great place to see what it is that men were created for is to read through the creation narrative in The Book of Genesis.

So how do you encourage men to participate? It’s tough to know, exactly. I think that a great way is to get to the heart of a man…that which God put deep inside each man. It’s different from anything else in the world, and hard to explain. See, men want to be rugged and tough. They want to shoot stuff, and fix stuff, and build stuff. They want to protect and defend, they want to love and be loved. They want to feel a purpose and be accomplished. Unfortunately, so many men don’t know how to do any of that stuff.

If we want men to participate, we have to encourage them, build them up and GIVE THEM A PERSONAL INVITATION. Personal invitations, from men they trust and respect, might just be the thing to get a man involved in the Life of the Church. The personal invitation should be in person, not over phone, texting or email. And once the invitation is extended, the event better not stink! Or be lame! And, it better not be associated with ‘sissiness’! If it does, he’ll never come back.

I encourage all the faithful, if they know a man who needs to be involved, to be like St Monica. St Monica, the mother of St Augustine, prayed unceasingly for her son. Augustine was a wandering-soul. He lived a life of incredible sin and his mother still prayed. He became one of the greatest saints and writers of the Church. That man who you know might just be the next St Augustine.

Click HERE for the article on iibloom’s site.

Next Page »