Men’s Formation Groups
October 25, 2010 by admin
Filed under Blog, cultural manliness, Faith, manliness, pornography, Virtue
Interested in joining a men’s formation group? Sometimes they are referred to as a “small group”. (If you are interested, I can connect you with a group in your area or teach you how to start one on your own.)
If you are in the Colorado Springs area, a new group will be meeting weekly. Any man is welcome to join, at anytime. The format of the meetings follows the highly tested and proven model created by The King’s Men. No matter what stage of life a man is in, no matter his education or experience, no matter his marital status or career, a formation group is good for every man. A small formation group is intended to be multifaceted. Men may experience some or all of the following from being in a small group: friendship, accountability, challenge, spiritual fortitude, fraternity, strength, encouragement, purpose, virtue!
The meetings typically go something like this:
- Group prayer – the Rosary is suggested. 15-20 minutes.
- Discussion based on a masculine resource. 30-45 minutes. (Masculine resources might be “Boys to Men: The Transforming Power of Virtue”, “Be a Man!”, an encyclical/papal letter, “Signposts” or something similar.) The discussion time is facilitated by a leader and kept on-time by the time keeper. The discussion is not a “teaching moment”, but a formation moment where each man has time to share if he so desires.
- The 4-Cs. Commit, Confess, Challenge, Confirm. Each week, each man makes a commitment to something he is going to do over the next week. The next week, he comes back and “confesses” how he did with his commitment. This process continues each week. If a man needs to be challenged, another man may do so. If a man deserves to be confirmed, another man may do so. 30 minutes.
- Closing prayer, including each man’s intentions. 5 minutes.
- Total meeting should be 1.5 hrs or less.
Groups should be kept to no more than 10-12 men. Once a group grows too large, it should be split into two separate groups. This is done so that each man has the ability to share, seek guidance, be formed and grow personally. If a group is too large, it stifles men’s ability to grow.
For more information on formation groups, especially the Colorado Springs group, contact me at Dave@TheKingsMen.org.
True Devotion to Jesus, Through Mary
Today is the feast day of St. Louis de Montfort. St. Louis lived in the 17th and 18th centuries and his greatest contribution to the faith
was that of perseverance in the face of critique and encouragement of the Church to be devoted to Jesus through Mary. For many, this Catholic teaching is hard because they may see devotion to Mary as an unnecessary practice, and in some cases, as blasphemous. Others may see devotion to Mary as something less-than-manly. On the contrary! Devotion to Mary, which St. Louis stressed in both writings, words and deeds, is the way to grow incredibly close to her son, our Lord, Jesus. As men, we have a great deal to learn about obedience and can learn a lot from Mary’s example.
First, the Maryology… there’s too much that would go into giving a dissertation on Mary here, however, I will draw attention to her place in salvation history. Mary accepted God’s will in her life and enthusiastically followed. Through her ‘yes’, Christ came into the world. Christ means King, and Mary therefore is the Queen Mother. The Queen Mother sits with the King petitioning for His loyal servants. (1 Kings 1:19.) By her ‘yes’, we reap the benefits of our Saviour.
St. Louis shows us that the theological virtues are the way to TrueManhood. He set a great example for us to achieve the virtues of faith, hope and love. The world attempts to tell men that these virtues are feminine and unnecessary. Take a look at just about any piece of media and you will see a direct attack against these virtues. St. Louis demonstrated great courage in the face of opposition and persecution to strive for faith, hope and love.
Lastly, a brief word of encouragement in regards to the Rosary. Faithful Catholics don’t just ‘say’ the Rosary, we ‘pray’ the Rosary. The Rosary is a mixture of reciting communal prayers (Our Father, Hail Mary, Glory Be, etc.) AND a deep meditation (simultaneously, mind you) of the mysteries of the Rosary. The mysteries point directly to Christ’s life and ministry, culminating in His saving work of dying on the cross for our sins – the greatest example of manliness we have! Pray on!
The Rosary is our sword in the battle of Good vs. Evil.
TrueMan up!
Two Stories
I came across this story a while back, and actually used it at a retreat I ran to intro a talk on virtue. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.
THE FIRST STORY: Many years ago, Al Capone virtually owned Chicago. Capone wasn’t famous for anything heroic.
He was notorious for enmeshing the windy city in everything from bootlegged booze and prostitution to murder. Capone had a lawyer nicknamed “Easy Eddie.” He was his lawyer for a good reason. Eddie was very good! In fact, Eddie’s skill at legal maneuvering kept Big Al out of jail for a long time.
To show his appreciation, Capone paid Eddie very well. Not only was the money big, but Eddie also got special dividends. For instance, he and his family occupied a fenced-in mansion with live-in help and all of the conveniences of the day. The estate was so large that it filled an entire Chicago City block.
Eddie lived the high life of the Chicago mob and gave little consideration to the atrocities that went on around him. Eddie had a soft spot, however. He had a son that he loved dearly. Eddie saw to it that his young son had clothes, cars, and a good education. Nothing was withheld. Price was no object. And, despite his involvement with organized crime, Eddie even tried to teach him right from wrong. Eddie wanted his son to be a better man than he was. Yet, with all his wealth and influence, there were two things he couldn’t give his son; he couldn’t pass on a good name or a good example.
One day, Easy Eddie reached a difficult decision. Eddie wanted to rectify wrongs he had done. He decided he would go to the authorities and tell the truth about Al “Scarface” Capone, clean up his tarnished name, and offer his son some semblance of integrity. To do this, he would have to testify against The Mob, and he knew that the cost would be great.
So, he testified. Within the year, Easy Eddie’s life ended in a blaze of gunfire on a lonely Chicago Street. But in his eyes, he had given his son the greatest gift he had to offer, at the greatest price he could ever pay. Police removed from his pockets a rosary, a crucifix, a religious medallion, and a poem clipped from a magazine. The poem read: The clock of life is wound but once, And no man has the power to tell just when the hands will stop at late or early hour. Now is the only time you own. Live, love, toil with a will. Place no faith in time. For the clock may soon be still.
THE SECOND STORY: 
World War II produced many heroes. One such man was Lieutenant Commander Butch O’Hare. He was a fighter pilot assigned to the aircraft carrier Lexington in the South Pacific. One day his entire squadron was sent on a mission. After he was airborne, he looked at his fuel gauge and realized that someone had forgotten to top off his fuel tank. He would not have enough fuel to complete his mission and get back to his ship. His flight leader told him to return to the carrier. Reluctantly, he dropped out of formation and headed back to the fleet.
As he was returning to the ship he saw something that turned his blood cold: a squadron of Japanese aircraft were speeding their way toward the American fleet. The American fighters were gone on a sortie, and the fleet was all but defenseless. He couldn’t reach his squadron and bring them back in time to save the fleet. Nor could he warn the fleet of the approaching danger.
There was only one thing to do. He must somehow divert them from the fleet. Laying aside all thoughts of personal safety, he dove into the formation of Japanese planes. Wing-mounted 50 caliber’s blazed as he charged in, attacking one surprised enemy plane and then another. Butch wove in and out of the now broken formation and fired at as many planes as possible until all his ammunition was finally spent. Undaunted, he continued the assault. He dove at the planes, trying to clip a wing or tail in hopes of damaging as many enemy planes as possible and rendering them unfit to fly.
Finally, the exasperated Japanese squadron took off in another direction. Deeply relieved, Butch O’Hare and his tattered fighter limped back to the carrier. Upon arrival, he reported in and related the event surrounding his return. The film from the gun-camera mounted on his plane told the tale. It showed the extent of Butch’s daring attempt to protect his fleet. He had, in fact, destroyed five enemy aircraft.
This took place on February 20, 1942, and for that action Butch became the Navy’s first Ace of W.W.II, and the first Naval Aviator to win the Congressional Medal of Honor. A year later Butch was killed in aerial combat at the age of 29.
His home town would not allow the memory of this WW II hero to fade, and today, O’Hare Airport in Chicago is named in tribute to the courage of this great man. So, the next time you find yourself at O’Hare International, give some thought to visiting Butch’s memorial displaying his statue and his Medal of Honor. It’s located between Terminals 1 and 2.
SO WHAT DO THESE TWO STORIES HAVE TO DO WITH EACH OTHER?
Butch O’Hare was “Easy Eddie’s” son!
Man up!
Everyday Examples of Manliness
There are a lot of things a man can do on a daily basis that are manly… here are somethings I’ve done this week that were manly.
Loved my wife, loved my kids, played with my kids, read my daughter stories, prayed with my kids, prayed the Rosary daily, washed my vehicles, filled my wife’s gas tank for her, fixed my American flag, took out the trash, was a courteous driver, followed through on job requirements without being micro-managed, explained the faith to someone, spoke with my accountability partner, planned a talk called “Mastering Christian Discipleship”, grilled meat, went to daily Mass, went to Confession, prayed the Stations of the Cross twice, spoke to a fellow man about how to overcome the pitfalls of pornography and masturbation, worked hard at achieving my future goals, disciplined my child, told my wife how special she is to me… what did you do this week?
Man up!
