Tuesdays with Daddy – “That Blue One’s the Boy One…”
March 3, 2010 by admin
Filed under Blog, Tuesdays with Daddy
It’s funny to see how a child’s mind works, and how profound a simple statement can be. Today, while walking through a gigantic multi-purpose store, my daughter spotted a rack of cheap summer-time rubber, bouncy balls. You know the kind… they stack them from the floor to the ceiling, with all different colors. The balls themselves are poorly made and wobble through the air because of the poorly designed air hole placement. Regardless, she noticed that something was different about the balls in the rack. She said, 
“That blue one’s the boy one, that pink one’s the girl one.” I informed her that she was correct as we zoomed past the balls heading towards much more important things – the outdoor section. As we continued on, she noticed lots of other toys that were specifically for boys and specifically for girls.
She had no idea what she was saying. All she knew was that boys play with blue things, trucks, beasts and get dirty and that girls play with pink things, dollies, host tea parties and despise getting dirty. This isn’t something we teach in our home, it is a natural instinct of a child. (Yes, there’s a lot of pink in my house for my two daughters, and lots of dolls, stuffed animals, dress up clothing and tiaras. However, there’s also toy cars, bats and balls, a fireman costume with ax and plenty of time to help Daddy around the house on various projects.) It brings up a point that’s frequently mistaken in our society. The point is that there’s a difference between men and women! John Paul the Great, the late Pope, spoke often about men and women having “equal dignity, but different roles”. It’s evident to children; maybe we need to return to a child-like way of living. Innocence, simplicity and freedom.
The point isn’t about the color, although you won’t find me in a pink or purple shirt. The point is that there’s a difference and as men, we must fulfill our role. Women have a role that they were created for and we have a role we were created for. When men fail to fulfill their role, women typically respond with an attitude of service and want to step in to fill a gap, but it’s not right for them to do so because it’s not what they were created for. So men, live a life in relationship to what you were created for: provider, protector, leader. More on this in the future.
Man up!
The color examples don’t make any sense. Attributing color to gender is arbitrary. It’s not an instinct. It’s learned. Before the 20th century, most babies were dressed in white because it could withstand hot washes. In the 1920s in the US, pink was for boys and blue was for girls. Pink was considered a watered down shade of red, think blood and blue was considered dainty because it was the color of the sky and water. The French dressed girls in pink and the Germans dressed boys in pink. It’s meaningless. Think dresses are for girls. Not in this country. Most boys wore dresses in the late 1800s because fabric was scarce and they grew out of pants too quickly. As for your men and women are different arguments, the scientific research has shown that there are more within group differences than between group differences for men and women aside from a few physiological differences. The reason that there is a difference is because society has created different rules for different genders. From looking around your website, I guarantee what I am writing won’t make a difference and you probably won’t give it a second thought, but it goes against everything that we know about our society. This site seems to be a giant amalgamation of stereotypical and baseless opinions. It is well-designed though and the layout is phenomenal. I hope that some healthier examples of masculinity, fatherhood and mentoring make their way to your site in the future.
I responded to this in my latest post as well (3/8/10)…
Allow me to respond to Jerrod. First off, thanks for the comment. Secondly, you’re missing the point in the first half of your comment. It wasn’t about the color, which I clearly stated in my original post. You bring up some other points that need clarification.
The “men and women argument” isn’t my argument. I’m merely stating what others (namely, John Paul the Great; one of the greatest philosophers and peacemakers in human history) have already worked out extensively. To say that there are “more within-group differences than between-group differences” is quite simply, false. Your scientific research is flawed. If you’d like to email me personally, I’m happy to take a look at what you are using as your source(s).
What you wrote is very important to me. What you wrote is, in part, why I have this website. I’m interested in bringing to light the truths of manhood so that our society can return to a properly functioning society. As of now, in our post-modern society, we do not function properly as a whole. This is mainly because males fail to live up to TrueManhood. I’m working to change that. You say that my website “goes against everything we know about our society.” You’re correct, I’m working to fight the culture we live in. Sin rules our world, and in order for society to thrive, we must fight our tendency toward sin. To say “what we know about our society” implies that what our society does/thinks is correct. What we think is correct, is not. Our society needs conversion of heart to the source of life – Jesus Christ.
As for the site being a “giant amalgamation of stereotypes and baseless opinions”, I disagree. My articles are based in Catholic truth, the fullness of truth. That’s a giant topic, so I don’t guess we can get into it here. I’m fighting the stereotypes of what is expected of males in our society – just read any of the articles I write about commercials we see. I’m guessing you probably haven’t really read many of my articles, or maybe that you don’t understand them. My apologies. And yes, while my articles are opinion, they are not baseless. My opinions are in line with the Church (many bishops and priests support my website) and are rooted in the understanding of virtue as a way of life. If you’re interested in reading more about virtue, type VIRTUE in the search box and get to reading – there’s lots there. Specifically, you can check out “TrueManhood’s Guide to Virtue”.
I appreciate the comments about the layout and design. I work hard to keep the sight going. (And, I’m always working on new stuff, and want more comments of what everyone is hoping for!)
Finally Jerrod, from your last sentence, I’d like to know what you think is a “healthier example of masculinity, fatherhood and mentoring…” Thanks.
Man up!