He shares his life, before sexual purity and now during it.  He shows that it’s a journey, and when faced with the hard decisions, a man has to know where he stands.  And for many reasons, he is preaching abstinence.  He mentions pleasure, let me tell you, it’s more pleasurable to give yourself selflessly to your wife than to use and abuse a girl and yourself.

The message is true, there is healing from past sexual sins.  And his comments about men being brought up by society, and what our times goes to and how we treat women… all on point.

Thanks to Jonathan for sharing this link.

TrueMan up!

BUT… I must say that I am VERY excited about an upcoming movie that is making its way to the big screen tomorrow (Friday, September 30, 2011).  The movie is called “Courageous”.  The producers of this film also produced the movie “Fireproof” (and a few others), which I thought was a good movie.  If “Fireproof” was good, “Courageous” is great!  I had the privilege of pre-screening the movie with my colleagues at our office and have the honor of being part of The King’s Men, one of the ministry-resources for men after they see the movie.

For the pre-screening, I went in very skeptical.  I went in believing that Sherwood Pictures was going to make the movie cheesy with Bible innuendos and very heavy, to the point of burdensome, like they did in “Fireproof”.  Not so.  ”Courageous” was very well done and had just the right amount of the “Jesus-factor” so as to still be relate-able as a tool for evangelization purposes with men who are non-believers.  This movie has action, drama, suspense, thrills, excitement and a host of other great characteristics.  I cannot recommend this movie high enough.  Go see it, even at current ticket prices, and show Hollywood that Americans want good, wholesome entertainment and not the garbage they have been spewing for years.

This movie is real.  It is about real men, attempting to live through some real life issues and situations.  It’s very practical and very helpful.  The acting is top notch, the storyline is right on and the cinematography is great.  Again, I cannot recommend this movie enough. (The trailer is located on our homepage on the right side.)

After you see the movie, you may want to get involved.  If you desire to follow in the example of the men in the movie, and become part of a small men’s group, I have a turn-key solution for you.  The King’s Men offers a men’s small group formation & accountability model that is easily duplicated, dynamic and proven.  We do not charge dues, have no membership and offer incredible support to our leaders.  Don’t try to reinvent the wheel – we have the track record of  a program that works.  Men’s lives are changed because of it.  Men who invest themselves into a men’s small group experience extreme growth and positive change.  Don’t wait another day!  If your parish/church/group/city/area gather enough men together, I can personalize a leader’s training workshop for you and train all of your facilitators in a day-long training session, complete with resource manual and all the how-to’s and nuts and bolts you could ever need.  The calendar is filling up fast, so contact me today!

For a list of existing groups, check out our GROUP LIST.  If one is nearby, all you have to do is show up.  If we don’t currently have any groups nearby, maybe this is the day you step up and start one.  Contact me for all the resources and support you need.  Dave@TheKingsMen.org.

TrueMan up!

First, I want to draw attention to his service to our great country!  Ryan is a Staff Sergeant in the US Army and hopefully soon (November ’11) will be graduating from Special Forces training.  Great job, Ryan – we are proud of you and honored by your sacrifice.  (Ryan shares some of his military experiences in his writings.  Great stories!)

Next, I would like to draw your attention to two books written by Ryan.  They are hot off the presses and are awesome.  I give my full recommendation of these books.  The first is entitled, “What Every Boy Man Needs: A Young Soldier’s Thoughts on Christian Manhood”.  The second is “My Dearest Sisters: Thoughts about Modesty from Your Brother…”.  Ryan “gets it”, and I think his writings will help others “get it” too.

For more on Ryan and/or to order his books, visit his website, The Man Who Would Be Knight.

TrueMan up!

We see all kinds of men on ITWs… young, old, rich, poor, fathers and sons and everything in between.  Outdoorsmen, and men who have never been in the wilderness.  Men who are proficient with tools, weapons and outdoor living and men who don’t know the first thing about any of that.  In the end, the men learn from one another and share their skills and talents to build one another up.

August 11-14 at Hickory Run State Park, Pocono Mtns of PA (register by Aug. 4)

September 8-11 at Raccoon Creek State Park, near Pittsburgh, PA

October 13-16 at Allegany State Park, near Buffalo, NY

October 27-30 at Pocahontas State Park, near Richmond, VA

The weekend is Eucharist-centered… because without Christ, we are nothing.  Christ the King is our guide and our model… we are His men.  Every day (Thurs evening through Sunday mid-day) includes Mass, perpetual Adoration, prayer and the Rosary as well as activities directly associated with being leaders, protectors and providers.  A retreat chaplain is with us on each weekend to celebrate the Sacraments and offer spiritual guidance.  (For ITW-Pittsburgh, Bishop David Zubik will be joining us again for a fire-side Q&A and for Confessions.)  Each day also includes activities/skill training and faith in a masculine modality.  We don’t sit around all day and listen to talks (we have one short talk a day)… we are active the entire weekend!  Prepare to be tired yet invigorated!  Overall, men experience something like never before; an experience unique and satisfying, as well as encouraging and fruitful in the lives of the men who attend.

Whether we’re orienteering, sitting around a campfire talking, praying, shooting, hiking, celebrating Mass, listening to a talk or building something, we are renewed and excited about our faith once again!  Come check it out… you won’t be sorry.  Oh yeah, and since we have a 5-star chef on the weekends, we eat really really really well!

For more info, to register and/or to watch the 10-minute ITW video, click www.IntoTheWildWeekend.com.

TrueMan up!

What’s happening in these boys’ lives is transforming, and will make an impact on them for years to come.  For boys, you have to engage them with the things that speak to their inner being – the things that make them wild, rough, adventurous and challenged.  This is the way Christ lived, that’s why it’s so appealing to boys.  It’s real, it’s authentically masculine and it’s really fun.

When you can reach a boy, you can teach him and form him.  When a boy is taught and formed properly, he becomes a great man.  Our world needs a lot of great men.

Please take a few moments to watch their video and visit their website.

TrueMan up!

(Our journeys are similar… from Kansas, to Colorado, to Pennsylvania.  And, I hear he’s a Steelers fan!)

Here’s an interview with him from Catholic News Agency…

Q:  You must have some interesting thoughts about being appointed to the See where the Declaration of Independence was written, the “City of Brotherly Love” where the first American male saint — St. John Neumann – was bishop.

A:  I don’t think it’s real for me yet.  I could give you half a dozen reasons why other men might be more qualified, and why I’m the implausible choice.  But I do believe in the Holy Father’s wisdom, so I accept that the See of Philadelphia is where God wants me to be.  My life as a priest – first as a Capuchin Franciscan and now as a bishop – is shaped by a commitment to obedience; obedience to God as Father.  The voice of the Pope is the voice of the Father for me.

I’m going to miss the Archdiocese of Denver very, very much.  Colorado has been home to me for 14 years.  The priests and people there have been unfailingly generous.  They really are my family, and a part of my heart will always be in Denver.

But I look forward to embracing the new family that God is giving to me, the family that is the Church of Philadelphia.  Over the years I have had many friends, both priests and laypeople, with roots in Philadelphia, and I’ve always been struck by their faith and their goodness.  So it’s a great privilege to be sent there. The fact that Philadelphia is where of the Declaration of Independence was signed and the center of so much of our country’s early history, means a great deal to me. I think the United States has been blessed by God in unique ways.  Because of that blessing, America has a duty to be a blessing for the world and for all people.  I also think that words like “the City of Brotherly Love” should be more than just a good tourist slogan.  Philadelphia is one of this country’s truly great cities, and I want to be part of renewing and deepening the best in this community.

I’ve been praying to St. John Neumann a lot since getting the news.  I want to love the priests and people of Philadelphia with the same zeal he brought to his ministry.  At least I can guarantee that no one will work harder, or try harder, than I will.

Q: What are the main challenges you might face in your pastoral mission?

A: The biggest challenge, not just in Philadelphia but everywhere, is to preach the Gospel in a way that captures the imagination of God’s people. The biggest task that lies before us is evangelization. We need to have confidence in the Gospel. We have to live it faithfully, and to live it without compromise and with great joy.

The Church in Philadelphia is at an important point in her life.  It’s not a time to be embarrassed about what we believe.  In fact, it becomes even more crucial to preach the Gospel – both within the Church and outside the Church.

Q: Regarding the grand jury report and allegations involving the clergy, what needs to be done in restoring the mission and the morale of the priesthood? What are your ideas about the priesthood, and also the relationship with the laity?

A: I haven’t read the grand jury report yet, and it will be awhile before I fully understand the issues.  I need to hear from the people involved in these matters and to learn the facts before I comment.

I do know that priests’ morale across the country has been seriously wounded by the abuse scandal.  I’m sure the priests of Philadelphia carry this burden in their own unique way.  But we know that Jesus, when he chooses men to be priests, chooses them with a brother’s love, and I want to be a sign of that love to my brothers.  We have to deal with scandal in an honest, thorough, confident way.  We can do that, even when it’s very painful, because we know that Christ rose from the dead.  “Jesus Christ is risen” — these aren’t just powdered words; they’re a statement of fact.  That should give us confidence that what happens in the Church, even when it seems death-dealing, can be turned into a moment of resurrection.

Q: What catches your attention most about the local Church in Philadelphia?

A: I have a lot to learn about Philadelphia, but I’m eager to get started.  I did live in western Pennsylvania for 10 years – first as a seminarian, then as a seminary professor, and eventually as a part of the administration of the Capuchin Province of St. Augustine based in Pittsburgh.  My time in the state was delightful. I look back on it with great joy. The men and women of Pennsylvania that I’ve met are wonderful people; good, generous and creative. I look forward to being a part of their lives.

Q:  You’re a Native American and quite proud of your heritage. Can you talk a little bit about your background, and what that means to you?

A: I’m Native American on my mother’s side. I’m a member of the Prairie Band Potawatomi tribe. Our reservation is in northeastern Kansas.

Being Indian was probably the entry point for my becoming a bishop. One never knows why one becomes a bishop, but my first assignment was the Diocese of Rapid City, South Dakota.   I suspect I was sent there was because of my engagement with the Native American Catholic community in the United States.  The Holy Father was looking for a way to reach out in special love to the native people.  So I see my episcopacy, in some ways, as born from that part of who I am.

The Native American people – the original inhabitants of this land – are a very diverse group with many, many gifts. I’ve always hoped that through my service as a bishop, those gifts can be recognized by the Church all the more, and that the Church can better meet the needs of Native people.

I was blessed to be the first Native American archbishop, and my people were honored by that.

Q: You’re also a Franciscan Capuchin.  St. Francis had a pretty radical approach to the Gospel, and the Capuchins were known as reformers within the Franciscan community. How does this shape how you see the Church’s task, and your role as a leader?

A: Francis was radical in the root meaning of the word “radical,” which means to go “to the root” of the matter. He wanted the friars to live the Gospel clearly, without compromise. The word he used was, “without gloss.” It was a custom, in the Middle Ages, to develop commentaries on the Gospel, and sometimes those commentaries would explain away the Christian’s responsibility to live the Gospel without compromise in every moment of our life.  Francis rejected any kind of effort to diminish the demands of the Gospel.

Of course, I have to live that discipline personally in my own life.  That’s the most important part of my Capuchin identity. But then I have to preach the Gospel in the same kind of way, in a way that’s clear, that’s always fresh, and always without compromise.

Before anything else, we’re called to be Catholics.  That should be the defining part of who we are.  Whether we’re Indians or Germans or Irish; whether we’re Democrats or Republicans, we are Catholic first.  Everything else is secondary.  Francis called his brothers not only to live that Catholic identity personally, but to preach that unvarnished Gospel with clarity. And I hope that my service as a bishop always enables me to do that.

Q: You’ve talked about this issue of Catholic identity frequently. Why is that so important to you? Is there something about American culture that encourages people to compartmentalize their faith from the rest of their lives?

A: Many of the dominant themes of our time work contrary to the Gospel.  All of us who are Catholics are very much influenced by our culture and by our society’s criticism of the Gospel. Because of these pressures, Catholics are often tempted to be embarrassed by their faith, and to make decisions that are compromised by our desire to somehow please the world, while satisfying God.  We often can’t do both. We always need to choose to please God first.

We need the support of the Church, the help of our brothers and sisters in faith, to live the Gospel in this difficult environment.  That’s why I’ve spent so much time in these last years, as a bishop, writing and speaking about this. I want the Church to have confidence in the Gospel and Christians to support one another, regardless of the opposition to the Gospel in our culture.

We owe it to our country and the age we live in, to be faithful Catholics.  If we’re good Catholics first, then we’re good citizens, and if we’re good citizens, then we’ll be a force of transformation for justice in the world. If we don’t live as faithful Catholics, we betray the Gospel.  We forfeit the opportunity God gives us to make a significant difference for the evangelization of culture.

Q: Many Catholics now serve in Congress, in state houses, in governors’ mansions — we even find Catholics as a majority on the Supreme Court.  But we often don’t see the content of Christian social teaching reflected in society. Does this relate to that issue of Catholic identity?

A: There’s an obvious temptation, in political life, to compromise Christian virtues and values because of the pressures of the society around us. But I wouldn’t first point to governors, or congressional representatives, or Supreme Court justices. I’d point to ourselves.  If our political leaders lack conviction about their faith, it’s because the members of the Church lack conviction about their faith.  Political leaders are no different from the rest of us. So if we point fingers at them, we’re also pointing fingers at ourselves, and at the broader Church community.

So the Gospel should be preached, first of all, in the Church.  Naturally, we need to preach it to political leaders as well. But they’re not alone – not by a long shot — in their tepidity and compromises of the Gospel.  If Catholics in their homes and parishes understand that, they’ll realize that a serious conversion needs to take place in all our lives, and not just in the lives of politicians.

Q: If this applies to every member of the Church, how do you think it applies to bishops? What do you think is the role of a bishop in American society?

A: A bishop, before he’s a bishop, is a Christian. And before he’s ordained, he’s baptized. So I think that anything that we say about Christians, we have to say about bishops, too. And bishops, because they’re raised up to be a sign of the presence of Christ in the Church, need to live the Gospel more clearly and more authentically, without compromise, than anyone else.

We can’t preach to others what we don’t embrace ourselves. And because we sometimes don’t practice these things ourselves, sometimes we’re embarrassed to preach these things to others. This is also why those who are called to preach the Gospel might sometimes be silent.

So I think that bishops always have to be engaged in the process of their own personal conversion – prior to calling others to conversion.  At the same time, we can’t let our sins and our failures cripple us; otherwise the Apostles themselves would have stayed silent. We have to practice what we preach. But even if we don’t, we always have to preach the Gospel. And if we preach it to others, conscious that we need to be converted ourselves, then things really will begin to change.

Q: From your perspective as a bishop, where are we as a Church, and as a nation, on the issue of abortion?

A: I think that our country, in some special sense, is going to be judged by God on that issue.  If we’re not able to protect the most vulnerable members of our society, then we aren’t living up to the public commitment we have as a nation to protect the life, liberty, and happiness of every individual. The unborn child certainly shares with us our human dignity, and has a right to those protections. That’s why I believe this remains one of the fundamental issues of our time. We can’t be a people of justice if we don’t protect the life of the unborn child.

This is, of course, just one of the pressing issues of our time. Also vitally important is the question of the meaning of marriage.  Family life is the foundation stone of all community.  It’s the first community that we’re born into. The health of our families will lead to the stability or weakening of our society.

The Church’s efforts today, to protect the traditional meaning of marriage, are on behalf of stable family life, for the sake of children. Marriage is a relationship of a man and a woman, in a stable and faithful way, for the sake of children. The most important thing for our development into mature adults is that we know that our fathers love our mothers and our mothers love our fathers. If we don’t know that, then a certain kind of instability enters our lives. Anything we do, as a country, to undermine that meaning of marriage, creates a danger – a clear danger – to the long-term health of our country.

Q: The fact that civil laws favoring so-called gay “marriage” have been approved in several places, in the last two years, has led some people to say that the Church, and especially the bishops, have “lost the argument” in the American culture. How do you think individual Catholics should approach this issue in their communities? And what is the right role of the institutional church and the bishops?

A: We only lose when we stop working and struggling for what we believe to be true.  In a very general sense, the battle was “lost” the day after Golgotha.  Except the disciples didn’t get the memo.

I don’t think we’ve lost the marriage issue at all.  Even framing the question that way shapes the answer in a wrong direction, because the language of a debate conditions how we think.  If we concede the language, we concede the issue.  I do think we’ve been allowing ourselves to lose the marriage debate for years, rooted in our confusion about individual and community rights, and our fear of being portrayed as “against” other people.  Catholic teaching on sexuality and marriage is for human dignity; it is for human happiness and the virtuous development of family and society.  It is “against” only those behaviors that undermine those goals.  When people try to frame Catholic belief as an intrinsic hostility for individual persons or groups, they are not being honest.

Cohabitation today without marriage is quite common, with children being born outside the context of married love, and many people are confused about what marriage really means.  Generally, people think “marriage” means a loving relationship between two people that has a sexual component. But that’s not what marriage means. It means a specific kind of loving relationship, for the sake of children. And the more we’re confused about that, the more damage we do to ourselves.  So we need to have confidence in our faith and keep fighting this fight with a spirit of serenity.  The Gospel is true, and the Church is right about the purpose of human sexuality, whether our critics like the message or not.  So much is at stake –not just the moral teaching of the Church, but the health of our communities and our country. If we love our country, that means we fight for the things that protect our country and make it strong.

Q: Four years ago you wrote a book on Catholic political and social engagement, “Render Unto Caesar.” If you had to write that book today, would it have a different accent? In other words, what issues look most important to you today for Catholic political involvement in the United States, and in general, Catholic involvement in the public square?

A: When I wrote that book, four years ago, I was responding to a request from a friend – a young husband and father — who had run for state office, but found it troubling because of the pressure in party politics to embrace issues contrary to Catholic belief.  I wanted to engage Catholics in a reflection on their responsibility for our country, and how politics can never be separated from faith even though “separation of Church and state,” properly understood, is a principle that’s worked well in our country. My point is that separation of Church and state was never intended to mean that we separate our faith from our social, economic and political life.

I have a high regard for the book’s publisher, and we’ve talked about doing an updated edition of “Render Unto Caesar.” Since my appointment to Philadelphia, I’ve had a certain kind of enthusiasm for a new version. So, give me some time, and you never know.   Maybe I’ll have some additional thoughts on faith and public in the 21st century.

This project was spurred on by the team at Maximus Group, a Catholic marketing firm who is promoting a new movie called Courageous that is coming out in September.  I’ve pre-screened the movie and it is awesome.  More on Courageous to come.

Listen to Mark Houck, Jesse Romero, Steve Pokorny, Bill & Billy Moyer, Chad Faddis and me as we share our thoughts on the great man-saint, St. Joseph.  What a TrueMan!

Click HERE to go to the Fathers For Good website.

With the recent news of the killing of Osama Bin Laden, there has been a lot of talk on how one should respond.  I’ve heard of many different responses – some that I agree with, some that I disagree with (and that I’m opposed to) and some that are neutral.  Have you heard these responses?… “USA! USA! USA!” or “We should not rejoice in the death of a man.”  or “He had it coming!” or “Proverbs 11:10″ or “I won’t lie and say I wasn’t excited about last night’s news.”  The list goes on and on.  Many responses get much worse.

First, in response to the outpouring of patriotism… we, as proud Americans, should always have an outpouring of patriotism, not just on July 4th, on Memorial Day, Veteran’s Day or on a day when one of the worst terrorist leaders and threats to America has been eradicated.  Do you always fly the stars and stripes, or only when it is fitting for celebration or your cause?  I proudly fly our flag every day.

Next, in response to “He had it coming” or other hate-filled responses.  Yes, the man was a terrorist and a militant one at that.  He was responsible for countless deaths, all across the globe.  I guess we could say, “Live by the automatic rifle, die by the automatic rifle.”  Nonetheless, the response should not be joy in his death.  Instead, I suggest going beyond the initial emotional response and thinking rationally about the situation.  (This is NOT to say that Bin Laden didn’t risk the sort of demise that he experienced.  Of course, in the militaristic fashion in which he lived, with nearly the entire world’s military forces looking for him, and with the excessive force that he displayed, there was a good chance that he was going to die in a fire fight.  And certainly, there is something to be said about our incredible troops going in and attempting to disarm and arrest Bin Laden so that he could be tried in a military court of law.)  It is hard for some of you reading to believe that there’s a better response to Bin Laden’s death than ecstatic rejoicing.  I challenge that idea by suggesting that we look at it in a different light.  (Note: this doesn’t take away what he did, what he was responsible for, who he instructed and what they might have done or will do, or any thing else.  It is merely the virtuous response.)

Here’s what I wrote on Facebook earlier today and some of the responses that my post got.  I wrote “I don’t know about anybody else, but considering that my brother, some of my friends and many other great Americans and Foreigners are in the middle east fighting for our freedom, we should rejoice not in the death of a man, but in the hope that the war may end and peace (which has never seen the light of day in the middle east) may come to all peoples.” I then commented, “Here is what the Church, our guide, says: ”In the face of a man’s death, a Christian never rejoices, but reflects on the serious responsibilities of each person before God and before men, and hopes and works so that every event may be the occasion for the further growth of peace and not of hatred.” – Vatican Statement on the Death of Bin Laden”

These are the comments that followed:

• “Thank you. I was kind of sickened at the reaction here, actually.”  (From a cadet at the Air Force Academy who witnessed her fellow cadets assembling in the middle of campus to celebrate the death of Bin Laden with cheers of excitement, dancing, loud music, chanting and so on.)
• I then responded, “I saw a video from last night at the Academy and thought I should post something. Although there is pride in being American, it should be there every day, not merely when we have a military victory and certainly should not be at the death of any man, woman or child.”
• “Thank you David for being the voice of reason. I have been very conflicted about this event since I learned of it last night during the Phillies game and the crowd started cheering “USA.” I couldn’t understand why people were so proud to have killed somebody–even a man responsible for the deaths of so many others.”
• “If we are going to stand up and say that all life is precious, we need to mean “all”. Even when we struggle to find forgiveness and compassion for a sinner.”
• “Right on, Dave”

Now, I’m sure that many others wanted to respond differently.  I understand, and can relate because of the many thoughts that ran through my head when I heard the news of Bin Laden’s death, to be glad that the hunt for Bin Laden is over.  I had shimmering hopes that maybe the war will come to an end sooner than planned.  I wondered if my brother, or anyone I know who is serving in the middle east, was a part of this mission.  I wondered what my father, a 30-year Air Force Veteran and Veteran of two tours in Viet Nam thought.  I even thought things in regards to Bin Laden’s Muslim Extremist faith and how all that might play out in the coming days, weeks and months.  None of that matters.  A man is dead and we, as Catholics, should mourn the fact that he did not know Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior.  Life is not about military victories, nor parties in the street, nor anything else.  Life is about achieving the ultimate gift of eternal life in Heaven with God.  Plain and simple.

This probably shouldn’t be the last time we discuss this topic, so if you’ve got thoughts, comments, or suggestions, leave them below in the comment section.

Again, here’s what the Catholic Church said today: “In the face of a man’s death, a Christian never rejoices, but reflects on the serious responsibilities of each person before God and before men, and hopes and works so that every event may be the occasion for the further growth of peace and not of hatred.”

TrueMan up!

Chris Medina – I have no idea if you made it past the initial cuts, but that doesn’tmatter.  You’re doin’ it right, bro.  You made all the men who strive to serve their wives step up their service and love.  Keep on.

Stories like this one should make us all stop and look at what we do and how we spend our days.  We were created for something more than ourselves and for something better than we have currently.  Striving for perfection, as Scripture instructs us, is so very hard.  Living a life of service, as a man of God, is hard.  Hard as it may be for Chris and his fiancée, I bet if you asked him if he’s happy, he’d tell you he’s more happy today than ever before.  Maybe he’ll read this and let us know first-hand.

Wow.

TrueMan up!

When Haggard speaks of restoration, he speaks as though he deserves it.  Although he can be forgiven, his attitude doesn’t seem (at least not to me) to be in the right place and it doesn’t seem that he wants to take any responsibility.  I’ve seen him in other videos and have always felt the same about those interviews.  He seems to place a lot of blame and like he doesn’t want to accept his consequences.  Not very manly, if you ask me.  ”…Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.”

I couldn’t disagree more with what he says in this video.  He speaks of “the church”, as most Protestants do, as the group of people who believe in Christ.  As Catholics, we speak of “The Church” in a different way and I think that, as She always has, The Church does a great job of restoring people.  It’s frustrating to see a video like this because this ex-pastor, who still has influence on people and can give them reasons not to believe, feels like he can say whatever he wants with complete disregard for who hears it or who he affects.

Watch it and see what you think.  Leave me comments.

TrueMan up!