Abortion – The Problem is Men

Did you know that we have a holocaust taking place in our country?  It’s happening in every state, and it is legal.  4,000 human lives are being destroyed each day, and the courts support this innocent slaughter of human life, and we’re supposed to go along with it.  Tax dollars, government subsidy, lobbyists, pharmaceutical companies, healthcare; they’re all wrapped up into it.  It’s called Abortion.

It is unfathomable that we allow abortion, especially knowing all we know about it.  There are countless facts, statistics, and logical arguments why abortion is murder, but I’m not going to get into any of those.  I’m going to concentrate on the real problem.  The problem with abortion is men.

Why?  Plain and simple.  85% of all abortions taking place in America are performed on single women.  That means that out of the 4,000 babies that were murdered today, 3,400 of those women who had an abortion were not married, and as many of you know, they feel they have no way out.  When single women are out sleeping around, who are they sleeping with?  Males.  Who gets them pregnant?  Males.  (Yes, God plays a huge part in the creation of that life, too.)  The facts continually lead back to the actions of the men.

If a woman is married, in a safe environment and protected, she isn’t likely to get an abortion.  Facts are facts.  These women feel led, protected and provided for, thus they welcome a new child.  Women who aren’t, don’t.  Men – when are we (as a gender) going to stop being selfish and self-serving and start protecting and cherishing women?  If you’re not married to her, you have no right to her – don’t touch!  She’s not there for your pleasure.  Serve her!  Take care of her!  Love her!!!

I heard a story today of a 20-year-old single woman who recently found out she was pregnant.  The sperm donor (best way to describe him… he isn’t married to her, isn’t her boyfriend, wasn’t even really her friend, just a “meaningless” hookup) told her “I’ll pay for everything.  I’ll even give you a ride and drop you off.  It’ll be fine.”  Class act, right?  Is the problem the baby?  CERTAINLY NOT!  Is the problem the young woman?  Not really, although she plays into the equation.  The problem is the man.  I hate referring to this sort of male as a man, because he most definitely is not living like one.

Men – abortion is only available because we allow it to be… because, in some totally screwed up way, we necessitate it by our actions.  Don’t be fooled, abortion is not about women’s health, women’s bodies, or women’s choice.  That’s a huge load of garbage.  And listen, I’m not saying that women don’t have anything to do with it, certainly they do, but the responsibility is on us.  Abortion will cease when men stop sleeping around, stay faithful and monogamous, and stop allowing the abuse, assault and murder of innocent babies.  The time is now, brothers.

TrueMan up!

Men, and Virtue, and How to Attain It

I wrote an article for “Made in His Image” ministry on men and virtue.  Typical stuff for TrueManhood, but something that Maura’s readers might not get a lot of.  To help support her and what she’s doing, please click the link to take you to there.

“Men, and Virtue, and How to Attain It” – CLICK THIS LINK

What MIHI is all about is helping women who struggle with eating disorders and/or who were victimized by abuse.  There is currently no other Catholic organization specializing in inpatient medical care for the healing of women, and Maura is working on creating this much needed resource.  I greatly applaud Maura for her efforts.  The issue of eating disorders and abuse can go hand in hand.  For countless numbers of women, young women specifically, a lack of self-worth can spur into many psychological, physical, emotional and spiritual issues.

For men, the issue that is constantly looming over us is the issue of sexual integrity, mostly dealing with pornography.  Not every man struggles, but just about every man did, does, or will.  For women, one main issue (compared to men’s issues with pornography, lust, etc.) is self-esteem and eating disorders, most of the time stemming from abuse of some kind.  Not all women struggle with this, but many do and more will if nothing is done about it.

I plan to write an article soon on the problems that women face when they fail to find their value from the proper source.  Watch for that soon.  You’ll be seeing more about MIHI on TrueManhood.com in the future.

TrueMan up!

Catholic Men’s Blog, Back Up and Running!

With great excitement, I write to let everyone know that TrueManhood is back up and running!  After a break for over 2 months due to a website hack, we were finally able to remove all the malware and are back at it.  Thank you to the hacker for allowing me to learn about website security a little bit more and about ways to protect my website from future hacks.  I pray for you and hope for your sake, that  from now on, instead of hacking my website, that you actually read it.

Many things have taken place in the world of Catholic men’s ministry, in the Catholic Church, in the pro-life battle and in America and we are sorry that we’ve missed it.  We’ve gone through 2 liturgical seasons (Advent and Christmas) and have jumped headfirst into the political race for the GOP candidate for the 2012 election.  We’ve seen incredible growth of our TKM Formation & Accountability groups, as well as a great victory for our organization in Federal Court versus a sexually oriented business that attempted to incriminate us and get us booted from the public right of way in front of their store.  Not to mention tons of other great stories of authentic masculinity, manliness, virtue and holiness.

There are some hopeful changes coming to the site in the near future, including the addition of new authors and more regular content, as well as a potential face-lift of the site to align the site more closely with The King’s Men.

Unfortunately, due to the amount of negative comments and potential threats of spambots, I have removed “commenting” to attempt to keep the site secure.  If you would like to get a hold of us, simply email us at contactus(atsign)truemanhood(dot/period)com and we will respond at our earliest convenience.

More to come soon on the fight against pornography, cultural manliness, and the culture of death!

TrueMan up!

“My Banner is Clear”

At the last two TKM Into the Wild retreats in October, we came across this very powerful and invigorating writing in the Magnificat from Patrick Madrid, a Catholic author and apologist.  The timing of this publication was impeccable.  It was amazing to hear the men read these words after having gone through so much growth on the weekend.  Many men embraced these words and are now Part of the Fellowship of the Unashamed.

THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE UNASHAMED

THE DIE HAS BEEN CAST. THE DECISION HAS BEEN MADE.  I HAVE STEPPED OVER THE LINE. I WON’T LOOK BACK, LET UP, SLOW DOWN, BACK AWAY, OR BE STILL.

MY PAST IS REDEEMED, MY PRESENT MAKES SENSE, AND MY FUTURE IS IN GOD’S HANDS. I AM FINISHED AND DONE WITH LOW LIVING, SIGHT WALKING, SMALL PLANNING, THE BARE MINIMUM, SMOOTH KNEES, COLORLESS DREAMS, TAMED VISIONS, MUNDANE TALKING, FRIVOLOUS LIVING, SELFISH GIVING, AND DWARFED GOALS.

I NO LONGER NEED PREEMINENCE, PROPERITY, POSITION, PROMOTIONS, APPLAUSE, OR POPULARITY. I DON’T HAVE TO BE RIGHT, FIRST, THE BEST, RECOGNIZED, PRAISED, REGARDED OR REWARDED. I NOW LIVE BY FAITH. I LEAN ON CHRIST’S PRESENCE. I LOVE WITH PATIENCE, LIVE BY PRAYER, AND LABOR WITH THE POWER OF GOD’S GRACE.

MY FACE IS SET. MY GAIT IS FAST, MY GOAL IS HEAVEN. MY ROAD IS NARROW, MY WAY IS ROUGH, MY COMPANIONS ARE FEW, MY GUIDE IS RELIABLE, AND MY MISSION IS CLEAR.

I CANNOT BE BOUGHT, COMPROMISED, DETOURED, LURED AWAY, TURNED BACK, DELUDED, OR DELAYED.  I WILL NOT FLINCH IN THE FACE OF SACRIFICE, HESITATE IN THE PRESENCE OF ADVERSITY, NEGOTIATE AT THE TABLE OF THE ENEMY, PONDER AT THE POOL OF POPULARITY, OR MEANDER IN THE MAZE OF MEDIOCRITY.

I WON’T GIVE UP, SHUT UP, LET UP, OR SLOW UP UNTIL I HAVE STAYED UP, STORED UP, PRAYED UP, PAID UP, AND SPOKEN UP FOR THE CAUSE OF CHRIST.

I AM A DISCIPLE OF JESUS. I MUST GO TILL HE COMES, GIVE UNTIL I DROP, SPEAK OUT UNTIL ALL KNOW, AND WORK UNTIL HE STOPS ME.  AND WHEN HE RETURNS FOR HIS OWN, HE WILL HAVE NO DIFFICULTY RECOGNIZING ME. MY BANNER IS CLEAR; I AM A PART OF THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE UNASHAMED.

BY PATRICK MADRID

Weddings Are About The Marriage

A few weeks ago, a colleague and great friend began his marriage.  The Nuptial Mass was beautiful and the party was lots of fun.  This weekend, some other longtime (and very special) friends are celebrating the start of their marriage.  We (my wife and I) couldn’t be more happy for these couples.  We know how incredible marriage can be and pray for only the best for these and all couples as they start into their vocation of marriage.

Often times, the wedding events can get the better of a couple and the point and purpose is lost in the colors, the flowers, the cake and the music – among a slew of about a million other ‘details’.  We experienced this in our wedding preparations, to some extent, and know that it is a temptation for most couples.  To keep it all in perspective… the wedding is all about the marriage.  The marriage is all about sanctification!  To be one with your helpmate and to help her get to Heaven.  To be blessed (if it be God’s will) with children and to help them get to Heaven.

A topic that I am convicted by is, as many of you have read before, my saying “Make the Choice to Love.”  It is so necessary and, in my estimation, the only way to give yourself fully to your spouse – by making the loving choice 100% of the time.  Below is a previous article that I wrote for iibloom.com called “The Choice to Love.”  I hope you like it and I hope it is helpful.

“Early in our marriage, my wife would ask me, in a somewhat sarcastic tone, “Are you making the choice to love right now?” It would stop me dead in my tracks to realize that I wasn’t. I like to think of myself as having a strong head on my shoulders and an ability to admit when I’m wrong. When my wife would ask that question, I knew that, in fact, I wasn’t making the choice to love and that I was dead wrong. I was not giving my wife the love and respect that she deserved. I took the unity that we had promised to one another in our wedding vows and I shattered it, so that I could be right. My need to be right was why I would argue. I would argue because I was stubborn. I was stubborn because I was self-centered. Notice that each of these scenarios containschoice and action. Instead of needing to be right, I should compromise and come to a common-ground understanding. Instead of arguing, I should suck up my pride and admit to my portion of the wrong doings and never, under any circumstances, should I place blame. (Placing blame activates defense mechanisms. Once defense mechanisms have been activated, good luck coming to the before mentioned common-ground understanding.) Instead of being stubborn, I should be humble. Instead of being self-centered, I should be marriage centered. I should make the choice to love.

If I always make the choice to love, I am making the decision that will best allow my marriage to grow and succeed. Love is a verb and requires action. The choice to love removes selfishness, pride and arrogance. Making the choice to love means and assures me that:

1. I am making the best decision for my marriage.
2. I am making the best decision for my spouse.
3. I am making the best decision for my family.
4. I am making the best decision for my family’s future.
5. I am making the best decision for myself. (By putting myself on this list, I am not forgetting that I am an integral part of the success or failure of my marriage.)

(The best decision, in this context, means making the decision that I know to be the best, at the time, with the knowledge and understanding that I have. The best decision is made with clear conscience and free from clouded judgment.)

The most important aspect of making the choice to love is a commitment from both spouses. Making the choice to love does not work when only one of the spouses participates. If you are in a relationship where your spouse does not respond to being asked to make the choice to love, I suggest that you have a serious conversation with them about their actions and how it might negatively affect your marriage relationship. (This is not gender specific, both the husband and the wife must make every effort to make the choice to love.) Insist on this, your marriage is counting on you. This principle will not work if both parties are not fully committed. We made a commitment to each other that whenever one of us mentions “make the choice to love,” we promise to immediately stop our behavior and make the conscious decision to love. We promised one another. It requires devotion and perseverance. We put aside our bad habits, pride and selfish tendencies and choose to love the other fully and without reservation.

The saying, “Make the Choice to Love,” holds a great amount of depth. It radically transformed our marriage. I want everyone to love marriage, either their own or simply the thought of marriage. It is possible for everyone to have an amazing, loving and wonderful life-giving marriage. “Make the Choice to Love.”

Army Soldiers and Families vs. “Adult” Store

I recently heard about this story from Leavenworth, KS – not far from my college alma mater, Benedictine College in Atchison, KS. It’s great to know that Army soldiers are standing against this garbage when so often military men have a reputation for being some of the main consumers of pornography.  Here’s part of the story from the American Family Association:

“Another Kansas community has been surprised by the opening of a new pornography outlet. This time the ambush is at the front gate of historic Ft. Leavenworth KS. Army families and the community are shocked at what was to be a book store but turned out to be a sexually oriented business (SOB).

The soldiers of the community, be they in uniform or civilians, are not taking this ambush lightly.  They have launched “OPERATION GATE KEEPER”.  They recently begin their public protest in front of the porn shop. They are also gathering signatures to seat a grand jury to investigate possible violations of the Kansas obscenity law and the community standards of Leavenworth.  The law is actually categorized under “Crimes against the Public Morals” … PUBLIC MORALS, now there is a “throwback” phrase not often heard!!!

Their public protest, to raise awareness ALREADY PASSED. It is in front of Cirilla’s , which is directly across from the post front gate. You are welcome to make a sign and join these soldiers in their efforts.

Soldiers take an oath to defend the constitution from all enemies be they foreign or domestic.  It is their belief that the laws of the land and the moral fabric of all American communities are under assault by the sexualizing of the culture. Cyber porn is surely taking it toll but these brick and mortar porn shops are part of the issue and a place that the law still has an effect.”

“I was Perfectly Spotless, I was Perfectly Clean”

5 minute video on one young man’s take on sexual purity.

He shares his life, before sexual purity and now during it.  He shows that it’s a journey, and when faced with the hard decisions, a man has to know where he stands.  And for many reasons, he is preaching abstinence.  He mentions pleasure, let me tell you, it’s more pleasurable to give yourself selflessly to your wife than to use and abuse a girl and yourself.

The message is true, there is healing from past sexual sins.  And his comments about men being brought up by society, and what our times goes to and how we treat women… all on point.

Thanks to Jonathan for sharing this link.

TrueMan up!

“The Club” = Cancelled

With great excitement, I write to tell that NBC’s “The Playboy Club” has been cancelled!  After only three episodes, NBC chose to quietly cancel the show.  It goes to show that those of us with concern for conservative values can still cause good things to happen in this country.  The show was cancelled due to low ratings and lack of sponsorship; sponsors were dropping left and right after receiving lots of feedback from concerned Americans.  They did the right thing and pulled their ads.  Thanks to organizations like The War on Illegal Pornography, headed up by Morality in Media, this is a victory.

I continue to receive lots of criticism for writing about this show and asking for support in helping shut it down.  People have been complaining left and right about it and quite frankly, I couldn’t disagree more with their comments.  This show was garbage and propagated the exploitation of women.  It glamorized clubbing and pornography, casual sex and money.  This show highlighted the “cultural manliness” lifestyle.  Those in support of this show and others like it need to take a long hard look at the garbage they are ingesting.  You are welcome to write more comments to me in favor of this show, where you try to tell me how ridiculous I’m being and so on.  They won’t be approved, so I recommend you don’t waste your time.

You cannot disregard moral issues by simply saying “If you don’t like it, don’t watch it.”  That doesn’t cut it.  That doesn’t answer the problem.  That’s moral relativism to the nines.  We get that kind of feedback when we protest sexually oriented businesses.  In fact, I got it the other day from a lady driving by in a minivan, with children in her backseat.  She said to me from the turning lane, “Are you guys serious?  Haven’t you guys heard of the saying ‘If you don’t like it, don’t watch it?’”

I responded, “Ma’am, do you have kinds in your van?”  She said yes.  I said, “Protect them from pornography, please!”  She asked again, “Why don’t you just not watch it?”  I said, “That’s not enough.  Pornography is an insidious problem, this is real and this is important.  Are you against drugs?”  I asked her.  She responded, “Of course.”  I said, “Then I couldn’t possibly say to you to tell your children, ‘Then just don’t use drugs’.”  They are more problematic than that.  There is no place for them in our society.  (Same with porn and crap like “The Playboy Club”.)  Anyway, she drove off and I yelled out, “Please protect your children from porn!”

And then I prayed for her.

TrueMan up!

“Courageous” Opens Tomorrow

VERY RARELY do I get excited about a movie debuting in the theaters.  To put my theater-movie-watching in perspective, the last two movies I’ve seen in the theater have been “Tangled”, which I took my oldest daughter to as a special daddy-daughter date and the 4th Indiana Jones.  (That one came out in the summer of 2008.)  So, you can see that I don’t frequent the movie theater.  Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy movies, but I struggle terribly to find time to go to the theater and I struggle even more with paying ticket prices for movies nowadays!  (Tangled was a matinee with a coupon, and someone gave me free passes for Indiana Jones.)

BUT… I must say that I am VERY excited about an upcoming movie that is making its way to the big screen tomorrow (Friday, September 30, 2011).  The movie is called “Courageous”.  The producers of this film also produced the movie “Fireproof” (and a few others), which I thought was a good movie.  If “Fireproof” was good, “Courageous” is great!  I had the privilege of pre-screening the movie with my colleagues at our office and have the honor of being part of The King’s Men, one of the ministry-resources for men after they see the movie.

For the pre-screening, I went in very skeptical.  I went in believing that Sherwood Pictures was going to make the movie cheesy with Bible innuendos and very heavy, to the point of burdensome, like they did in “Fireproof”.  Not so.  ”Courageous” was very well done and had just the right amount of the “Jesus-factor” so as to still be relate-able as a tool for evangelization purposes with men who are non-believers.  This movie has action, drama, suspense, thrills, excitement and a host of other great characteristics.  I cannot recommend this movie high enough.  Go see it, even at current ticket prices, and show Hollywood that Americans want good, wholesome entertainment and not the garbage they have been spewing for years.

This movie is real.  It is about real men, attempting to live through some real life issues and situations.  It’s very practical and very helpful.  The acting is top notch, the storyline is right on and the cinematography is great.  Again, I cannot recommend this movie enough. (The trailer is located on our homepage on the right side.)

After you see the movie, you may want to get involved.  If you desire to follow in the example of the men in the movie, and become part of a small men’s group, I have a turn-key solution for you.  The King’s Men offers a men’s small group formation & accountability model that is easily duplicated, dynamic and proven.  We do not charge dues, have no membership and offer incredible support to our leaders.  Don’t try to reinvent the wheel – we have the track record of  a program that works.  Men’s lives are changed because of it.  Men who invest themselves into a men’s small group experience extreme growth and positive change.  Don’t wait another day!  If your parish/church/group/city/area gather enough men together, I can personalize a leader’s training workshop for you and train all of your facilitators in a day-long training session, complete with resource manual and all the how-to’s and nuts and bolts you could ever need.  The calendar is filling up fast, so contact me today!

For a list of existing groups, check out our GROUP LIST.  If one is nearby, all you have to do is show up.  If we don’t currently have any groups nearby, maybe this is the day you step up and start one.  Contact me for all the resources and support you need.  Dave@TheKingsMen.org.

TrueMan up!

“The Playboy Club” is Bombing!!!

Here is an update from Executive Director Dawn Hawkins of The War on Illegal Pornography on NBC’s “The Playboy Club”.  Great news!

“NBC and Playboy were ALMOST convincing last night as they struggled to portray that life as a bunny was everything BUT being treated as an object to be exploited by men. This week, the episode followed the bunnies and their opportunity to be featured on the cover of Playboy magazine.

The bunnies were asked why they wanted to be the new cover girl. I found the answers almost comical with responses like, “In my bunny suit, I’m in total control,” or “I want to show people that I can do big things,” and “I always dreamed of finding some place where I belonged… so, here I am.”

What type of woman would buy into that? Playboy doesn’t show the world that these women are smart and independent.Instead, they show women that their role is to just be a visual, sexual object to be used and discarded by men.

This has been Playboy’s stance on women since their first issue in 1953. We recently found this text from the first issue. “If you’re a man between the ages of 18 and 80, Playboy is meant for you… We want to make it clear from the very start. We aren’t a ‘family magazine.’ If you’re somebody’s sister, wife, or mother-in-law and picked us up by mistake, please pass us along to the man in your life and get back to your Ladies Home Companion…”

Playboy has made it clear that their brand is not about making the world a better, more accepting place for women. It was a man’s world and that is exactly how they want “The Playboy Club” on NBC to be – a man’s world where women just look pretty and keep the scotch pouring.

Since our efforts last week of contacting advertisers, already SEVEN companies have pulled their ads and refused to support the Playboy brand – Kraft, Sprint, Lenovo, UPS Store, Subway, PF Chang’s China Bistro and Campbell’s Soup.

The show also bombed in their ratings – a 19% decrease from their already low ratings last week! We see this as a huge victory and are continuing the effort this week. The contact information for the current advertisers is updated on www.CloseTheClubOnNBC.com. Contact these companies weekly and tell them how exploitive and objectifying “The Playboy Club” is towards women and why it should be closed!”

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